#incorrect matthias

[grishaverse-said]

Matthias: In your opinion, what's the height of stupidity?

Kaz: *turning to Jesper* How tall are you?

[iwillwalkthroughthefire]

Violet: Okay, I have to tell you the truth. The monsters from the fairytales are real. They're coming to kill us all, and our government is corrupt and trying to hide it from us.

Rhiannon, Ridoc, and Sawyer: Holy shit! Oh, this is such a relief! We thought that you were, like, mad at us or something. YES!!! Let's go do some TREASON!

[aprill-99]

Xaden: “Okay everyone, safety briefing for this weekend.”

Xaden *to Ridoc and Bodhi*: “Do not add to the population.”

Xaden *to Imogen*: “Do not subtract from the population.”

Xaden *to Rhiannon, Sawyer, and Garrick in order*: “Do not end up in the newspaper, the hospital, or in jail.”

Xaden *to Violet*: “If you do end up in jail, establish dominance quickly.”

[mysterylilycheeta]

Rhiannon: Don't you just hate men sometimes? They can be so useless! Imogen: Right? They're terrible! Jesinia: *signs* 100% Violet: Definitely. Xaden, Garrick, Bodhi, Ridoc, Sawyer, and Dain: Liam: Violet: Not you Liam, you're perfect! The other girls: Honestly, he is! The boys: Wh-

[stupidlybookish]

First half of Iron Flame summarised:

Violet: Xaden isn’t in love with me.

Rhiannon: Yes he is.

Imogen: Yes he is.

Bodhi: Yes he is.

Ridoc: Yes he is.

Tairn: Yes he is.

Xaden: YES I AM.

[incorrect-fourthwing]

Rhiannon: Unfortunately, I am in charge of this disaster.

Ridoc: I have a name, you know.

[shimmerytimbers]

Kaz: People tell me I have a unique way of lighting up a room.

Matthias: It’s called arson and those people are called witnesses.

[cherries-and-knives]

Matthias: *has one Unholy™️ thought about nina*

Matthias to himself: TAKE A WALK YOU ABSOLUTE WHORE. AND WHILE YOUR AT IT YOU MIGHT AS WELL JUMP IN A RIVER YOU SLUT.

[justascrollingghost]

Violet: WHAT’S THE PLAN?!

Ridoc: WHAT?! IT’S YOUR TURN TO COME UP WITH AN ESCAPE PLAN?!

Violet: IT’S THURSDAY?! THAT’S YOUR ESCAPE PLAN DAY?!

Ridoc: IT’S THURSDAY?! SHIT I’VE GOT AN APPOINTMENT AT 5

Violet: OH WELL I DO APOLOGISE FOR INTRUDING ON YOUR SALON TIME

Rhi: WHY DO WE ALWAYS END UP NEARLY FUCKING DYING I THOUGHT WE WERE GOING FOR LUNCH?!

Sawyer: HOW LONG HAVE WE BEEN MISSING?!

Ridoc: OH WELL JUDGING BY THE ANGLE OF THE SUN - I DONT FUCKING KNOW?!

Rhi: 47 MINUTES!

Sawyer: NEW PLAN! NOBODY DIE FOR 13 MINUTES AND WE’LL BE SAVED BY A PISSED OFF XADEN WHO WAITED VIOLET’S FULL ‘FREEDOM TO DO STUPID SHIT’ HOUR

Everyone: SOLID PLAN!

[poorlythoughtoutdescisions]

here me out: six of crows as a dnd campaign.

DM: Jes, roll for insight please

Jesper: Nat 1

DM: Yup that's definitely Wylan

-

Nina: NAT 20

DM: HOW??? THATS THREE IN A ROW

Nina: FUCK YEAH I MIND CONTROL THEM ALL

-

Kaz: can i kiss her? on the neck?

DM: sure, constitution saving throw.

-

Matthias: I hate her

Nina: I ROLL TO BEGUILE HIM WITH MY GRISHA CHARMS

Matthias: what modifiers do you have to get THIRTY???

-

[angstywaifu]

Rhi, entering Violet's room: Why are you taking so long to get ready? Violet, out of breath: I..I just can't find anything to wear Rhi, opening the cupboard: What? You have lots of clothes. Lets see, shirts, trousers, hi Xaden, jackets, more shirts

[grishaverse-said]

Matthias: I'm pretty sure that place is fire-proof, or something. Wylan, grenade in hand: Alright, but is it explosion-proof?

[iwillwalkthroughthefire]

Ridoc: Yeah, of COURSE I've fantasized about Xaden. Everyone has! Just ask them! Well, except maybe Rhiannon, but that's only because she's a total l-word.

Violet: Seriously, Ridoc? You're openly bi, but you won't say the word lesbian?

Ridoc: Huh? This has nothing to do with Rhi being a lesbian. I'm calling her a LIAR!

[ruins-and-rewritez]

*Crow conversation overheard on the streets of Ketterdam*

Inej: *shivers* hey Kaz, I'm a little cold do you think you could, you know

Kaz: of course *snaps fingers*

Jesper: *takes off coat and hands it to Inej*

Inej: thanks

Wylan: wait. what if I'm cold too?

Jesper: oh, well then *snaps fingers"

Kaz: *fans fingers out magician-ly, reaches inside coat to pull out, you guessed it, another coat that he hands to Wylan*

Wylan: *visibly confused* thank you? I think?

Inej & Jesper: *clap enthusiastically*

Kaz:*bows dramatically*

*Meanwhile trailing a little ways behind them*

Nina: *snorts* lol can you believe those dorks

Matthias: HoLy sHiT Nina did you see that!?!?! He pulled that coat out of NOWHERE!!!

[mysterylilycheeta]

Ridoc calling Rhi: I hate being this high, why do I keep hearing footsteps? Rhi: Are you walking? Ridoc: Oh shit

[idk1027]

Violet: *Walks into the room looking pissed*

Xaden: Who needs to die Garrick:

Bodhi:

Ridoc:

Sawyer:

Rhiannon:

Imogen: Wrong question Xaden. Who’s dead?